


Updog

by pocketsofposie



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: F/F, Pothead!Penelope is a nice trope, a lil bit of hizzie if you pull out a magnifying glass, did i mention weed?, don't do drugs kids, half of this is jus me projecting dumb shit i do, maybe deep stuff if you have a shallow definition of deep stuff, some typa soulmate au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-18 20:07:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19341706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pocketsofposie/pseuds/pocketsofposie
Summary: Soulmate AU where everyone can hear occasional random thoughts from their soulmate.Or Penelope Park is a pothead who has some really weird thoughts and her soulmate Josie Saltzman doesn't know what the fuck is going on, but falls for her anyway.





	Updog

Josie Saltzman is 14 years old when she hears one of her soulmate’s thoughts.

 

One second she’s eating a cinnamon twist donut and mid-bite she’s hearing: _I’ll just add the sex herbs in with it, no big deal._

 

Josie immediately stops chewing and stares at the half-eaten donut in her hand. Sex herbs? It’s 5 pm on a Tuesday and her soulmate is thinking about sex herbs. What does that even mean, what are they being added in with? It seems like a big deal.

Josie’s never heard of sex herbs, but then again she’s never heard of anything outside the Salvatore school.

 

A two-sided conversation about this would be nice, maybe discussing the long-term health effects of these said sex herbs.

 

Could it be a pizza topping? It sounded exotic.

 

—

 

The next time Josie hears from her soulmate she’s confident she’s been matched with a serial killer.

 

Hearing _might as well just throw him down the hill. Who’s going to tell on me? The dead guy?_   in the middle of a chemistry of magic test isn’t the best for concentration.

 

She should probably be more shocked, but landing a psychopathic murderer soulmate before her sixteenth birthday? Somewhat disappointed, but not surprised.

 

Her soulmates, a total serial killer because _of course_ they are.

 

If Josie’s already a rare witch subsection, and a last remaining member of her coven, it would just be _so typical_ for the universe to match her with a possible assassin.

The complete bewilderment of the situation distracts her from finishing the test, and with only 5 minutes of class left, Josie goes back to identifying the magical components of wolfsbane.

 

As if the love of her life isn’t probably throwing bodies into holes as she’s drawing chemical structures.

 

—

 

The chance that her soulmate is not a total sociopath is delivered by the next thought.

 

Josie hadn't even completely processed her last soulmate experience, with Lizzie’s endless serial killer pick up lines.

(Are you a thief? Because you’ve stolen my heart. And quite possibly my kidneys. Josie hoped the three hours of work her twin put into these for teasing was worth it)

 

She was helping MG with his speech about the lack of representation of consent in vampire culture when she heard the thought.

 

_Vampire constitution prevents falling on your ass from qualifying as damage to “supernatural species cohabitation” what auto bot generated these write-ups?_

 

Josie freezes and rethinks the words back to herself. There’s no way an ordinary occult fan would know of the supernatural cohabitation act, her soulmate had to be supernatural.

 

Josie’s not really sure how she feels about that.

 

She’s heard stories of humans being matched with witches, and then fleeing in fear once they uncovered their true nature. 

 

Josie didn’t think she could handle it if the one person who wasn’t supposed to leave her chose to walk away.

 

If her soulmate wasn’t in jail for murdering someone, the “dead guy” must’ve just been a vampire. An upset vampire, who obviously ratted her out to whatever local supernatural leaders deal with conflicts.

 

Whoever that is or however that may work, she has no clue.

 

Josie snaps out of her thoughts as MG waves a hand in her face.

 

‘“You still with me? I’m presenting in 5 minutes and I gotta break the news that my second in command got detention to Dorian and he’s definitely not gonna be happy she’s missing.”

 

Josie pats his shoulder and offers him a reassuring smile, “You’ll do great MG, with or without your devil of a partner.”

 

She wishes she could say the same about her not so serial killer soulmate, but quite possibly witch or werewolf counterpart. With the way they talked about vampires it was clear there was no chance.

Witch, werewolf, tribrid for all she cared, if they could just begin to explain how sex herbs were put on pizza she would be satisfied.

 

Is it baked into the bread? Or sprinkled on top like oregano? How does it contribute to taste?

 

Josie had been thinking about it more than she would like to admit.

 

—

 

_But how can it be “Birthday Cake” flavour if a birthday cake can be any flavour?_

 

Josie stuffs her head under her blanket.

 

Do they ever _fucking sleep?_

 

She hates that her thoughts loitered on (chocolate flavoured) “Birthday Cake” flavour for the rest of the night.

 

—

 

Josie entertained the idea of her soulmate possibly being Rafael Waithe.

 

He wasn’t exactly the type of person to match the thoughts, but he was a nice guy with a genuine smile and walked her to classes.  
He’s the type of guy people would expect for Josie, the charismatic prince charming wolf and the caring quiet second twin.

 

A perfect match, it was easy.

 

She tried to subtly bring up the topic of sex herbs without looking like she’d completely lost it, but was met with equal bafflement on the subject.

 

Rafael liked football, poetry and action movies; not philosophy, chess or origami.

 

When he excitedly talked about how the next wickery game was “all he could think about”, she tried to not let her disappointment shine through.

 

The last thought Josie received was about her soulmate brewing special rainwater for their plants; something to do with it having a neutral pH essential for prime growth.

The only time she’d seen Rafael interact with plants is when he tripped and knocked over the pots in the hallway.

 

It wasn’t him, and maybe Josie was thankful for that.

 

Because if Rafael was good enough, her soulmate would be perfect.

 

—

 

Josie learns of her soulmates musical prowess mid-sleep when she hears the tune of a kid’s song. She’s convinced it’s just her brain conceptualizing for all the time she spent in the primary sector recently, until it doesn’t stop.

 

_Baby shark, doo doo doo doo doo doo_

 

Josie’s on the verge of waking up Lizzie to find out what mystery speakers are blaring this song at an ungodly hour until she sees her twin sleeping soundly with no disturbances. After recovering from the initial shock, Josie realizes that the song is coming from her head, but not from her.

Her soulmate’s the basket case turning up to baby shark, of all things, at 6 am.

 

_Daddy shark, doo doo doo doo doo doo_

 

By the 36th doo, an off-key makes Josie aware that the song isn’t just stuck in her soulmate head, they're playing it.

 

On the piano, at the crack of dawn, on repeat.

 

_Grandma shark, doo doo doo doo doo doo_

 

While singing along.

 

Josie mentally scolds herself for her thoughts immediately jumping to how nice a piano ukulele duet would sound.

 

Who knew how long the thoughts would keep coming through, so when the last verse finally arrived, Josie caved and sang along.

It's a bop, she’ll admit.

 

_Let’s go hunt!_

 

—

 

The most bewildering thought Josie hears from her soulmate happens during a cram study session along the lines of: _pickles and peanut butter taste just like updog._

It’s particularly odd as no amount of context can begin to explain a quote about pickles and a updog at 4 in the morning, so she begins to complete her own research.

 

Josie finds herself in a compromising situation when her twin walks in on her placing pickles on a peanut butter sandwich. Lizzie stops herself short of questioning her sister’s well being, and what pushed her to the point of creating the absolute atrocity she was about to eat. But it was if something clicked, and Lizzie just gives her a knowing smile.

 

“So, is this like a serial killer soulmate thing-“

 

Josie huffed and poked at the completely unappetizing sandwich. “Yep, serial killer soulmate.”

 

Lizzie shrugged and grabbed a drink from the fridge,” It could be worse, trust me, I listened to Drake for a week straight after I heard mine singing hotline bling. It was revolting honestly, but oddly nice to just be y'know, connected to them.”

Josie nodded back as Lizzie exited the kitchen, staring at the repulsive sandwich with a new sense of determination.

 

She didn’t know what she was expecting to taste, but it really wasn’t half bad. As long as her soulmate wasn’t a fan of pineapple on pizza she could take the occasional weird combo.

 

Whether or not it qualified as _updog_ was beyond her.

 

—

 

The rooftop seemed like a good enough place for Josie Saltzman to brood.

 

So that’s what she did, or at least tried to do, before she was rudely interrupted.

 

Penelope Park did not knock before entering, and did not ask if she was welcome, she simply sat down next to Josie and started eating her skittles.

 

Josie rolled her eyes. “Those are mine.”

 

“Then you should probably stop me, ” Penelope looks like she doesn’t care, and continues to steal them. “But you won’t.”

 

She doesn’t.

 

They sit in silence. Penelope pulling out a crumpled piece of paper from her pocket and folding it into a crane, before giving it a light kiss as its wings flap to life and take off.

 

“So are you going to tell me what the hell you’re doing up here or am I just going to have to hold your skittles hostage for you to crack?” she asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

 

Josie stares back in defence. ”Why do you care?”

 

The paper crane returns and flutters into Penelope’s hands.

“Humor me.” Penelope’s focus remains on unfolding the crane, ”It’s not like there is a large surplus of tolerant strangers to confide in.”

 

Josie wouldn’t exactly call Penelope a stranger, she’s known her since primary school when the shorter girl picked her first for dodgeball, effectively stealing Josie from her sister’s team and leaving Lizzie fuming.

A talk would be nice, and Penelope was tolerable at best, so it couldn’t hurt.

 

“Lizzie said she found her soulmate.”

 

Josie waits for a snide remark, something along the lines of “Good luck to whoever has to love that for eternity”

 

It doesn’t come.

 

Penelope watches her, expression soft, folding paper between her fingers effortlessly.

 

She takes it as a cue to continue, “She was dating MG, they were happy and then she breaks up with him because she found the person she was meant to be with her whole life.”

 

Josie can feel herself getting tense, but blowing a fuse around Penelope wouldn’t be healthy, so she compartmentalizes and tries to remain focused.

“The idea of having your whole destiny mapped out before you is terrifying. You have no say, and you’re just supposed to accept that the universe is going to give you everything you want.” Josie’s eyes trace over Penelope, searching for any indication she should stop, “We’re supposed to stop any other possibilities in life, without even knowing the person. What happens if it’s not good enough, if it’s disappointing?”

 

Josie ignores the underlying worry of it all; _what if I’m not good enough?_

 

She can’t even rely on her dad to show up to the science fair, much less the universe to map out her whole life. Josie takes what she can get, she’ll be satisfied by what she’s offered, but soulmates are a pair. There’s always a chance that the other half won’t reciprocate the mentality, always a chance they’ll desire more than what Josie can offer.

 

“I think it's comforting.”

 

She wasn’t expecting Penelope to give her own answer, but she’s curious to what the resident HWIC thinks, so she listens.

 

“Knowing no matter what you chose or what you fuck up, things will always turn out the same, there’s always going to be that one person for you no matter what.” Penelope’s sitting right next to her but she feels miles away, staring aimlessly, “There is always a say, but soulmates don’t carry that burden of choice. The best version of yourself is the perfect version for your significant other, and if other relationships allow you to find yourself, they aren’t a lost possibility.”

 

Josie never thought of it like that; fate could be comforting. If she already knew how everything was going to end up, it wouldn’t matter how things played out now, she didn’t have to worry about that.

 

It didn’t matter that every time she tried to boil water it evaporates or that she still slept with a night light on because in the end, none of it mattered. Soulmates are a universal match, a complete pair, faults and all, and no matter how Josie felt she was falling short, they wouldn’t see it.

 

“So Penelope Park is actually a hopeless romantic?” Josie grins and wiggles her eyebrows at Penelope who scoffs, but then wiggles her’s back.

 

“Say shit and I’ll go around telling everyone that you're the one who set Jed’s textbook on fire in seventh grade.” Penelope gives her an amused glance, and Josie has to push the thoughts screaming god she’s pretty to the back of her mind.

 

Penelope Park was pretty obviously, Josie has eyes, her brain was simply appreciating the aesthetics it wasn’t anything personal.

 

Josie makes a motion of closing a zipper over her lips and tries not to react when Penelope reaches over grabbing what she assumes to be the pull tab from her lips and throws it off the roof.

 

The comfortable silence from before returns, and she indulges in it for as long as she can.

 

Until all the remaining skittles are gone.

 

With them leaves her excuse to be hanging out with a Park.

 

A notification alert is what snaps Penelope out of bending paper in ways Josie didn’t think was possible. The contact reads ‘Rolling Stoned’ and Josie doesn’t comment, averting her gaze to anywhere but Penelope.

 

”Sorry to cut the date short, but tonight's Jupiter’s Opposition and y’know how witches are during any remotely celestial event.” Penelope stands up to dust off some stray skittles on her shirt, “I’ll see you around, Jojo.”

 

Ignoring the implications of a date, Josie gave Penelope a thumbs up in return.

 

_A thumbs up? Shit, was that weird?_

 

Whether or not it was strange isn’t acknowledged by Penelope as she walks away, stopping just to blow Josie the origami she was working on before exiting.

 

The paper figure lands right in front of Josie; it was some type of bird.

 

A turtle dove.

 

It fluttered around Josie before landing in her hand, making some gagging motions, and spitting out a red skittle into her palms.

 

Penelope Park was unbelievable.

 

—

 

_Beanbag chairs are just boneless sofas._

 

Josie refuses to dignify that with a response.

 

Even if the chemistry nerd inside her is indulging in the pun of water just being _bondless_ ice.

 

—

 

Sometimes at half past midnight, Josie plays out soft little tunes on her ukulele and imagines what life would be like without magic or predetermined destiny’s.

 

Hope found her soulmate after recognizing the sass behind a particularly long narcissistic rant, as Lizzie Saltzman’s snark. She wouldn’t have guessed in a million years that the person Lizzie heard midway through her defence magic exam wondering if Batman vs Superman was a new era film the world deserved, was Hope Mikaelson.

Lizzie and Hope were meant to be in a way Josie couldn’t understand, and worried she never would.

 

If anyone was a professional at feeling inferior, it was Josie. There was always the lingering possibility of not living up to expectations, which is unrealistic when you consider she constructed them herself. She can’t help but want to be perfect for the person who’s supposed to be perfect for her.

 

But the unplanned musical jam sessions and the experimental food combos weren’t all that prime and perfect, and maybe that was okay.

 

Maybe everything could be flawed and chaotic.

 

Maybe Josie could be perfect for them in the most imperfect ways.

 

Instead of being two perfectly slotted jigsaw pieces, maybe they could be a cryptic crossword. Messy and confusing with words that can make no fucking sense but everything comes together at the end for one complete puzzle.

 

—

 

_It’s cool. We’re cool. Play it cool. There was no tripping down a flight of stairs like an uncoordinated giraffe, there was an absence of tripping._

 

Josie couldn’t stifle the light laugh she let out.

 

—

 

Josie was left with her own thoughts for quite a while after the tripping incident. Exam season had just started and if she spent all her time solving for her soulmate, she wouldn’t have enough time to solve for (x).

 

Her defense magic exam went up in smoke, quite literally, as the task was to extinguish the fire while Josie proceeded to add fuel to the flame.

As headmasters daughter, a failed exam was a black mark on not only her record, but her father’s. Once he noticed, it would be a five-minute disappointed speech and an impulse monster trip with Hope before Josie could even attempt getting a word in.

 

Josie didn’t need a disappointing speech, she was already giving one of those to herself. A confidence-boosting pep talk or ‘you’ll do better next time’ is something she could wistfully imagine coming from her mom.

 

And right now Josie needed her mom.

 

She didn’t need her dad to look at her for 5 seconds before running away on another errand, or Lizzie to whine about how Penelope Park got the top mark.

 

Josie wanted something for herself, someone who didn’t make her feel insecure or inferior, and as much as she loved her family, it wasn’t them.

 

If everything around her was always going to chaos, she needed something permanent.

If she’s constantly going to be running through the pouring rain, while giving everyone else her umbrella, she needed somewhere to wait it out. A bridge would be nice, a place to run under where the bashing of raindrops goes silent and it’s almost peaceful.

 

Josie needed a bridge.

Or maybe she just needed to get over herself and learn to ride a bike.

 

Almost as if someone heard her distress and decided to answer, she received a new thought. Something her soulmate was quoting? Reading perhaps?

 

_You don’t need to do anything, because if you see yourself in the correct way, you are all as much extraordinary phenomenon of nature as trees, clouds, the patterns in running water, the flickering of fire, the arrangement of the stars, and the form of a galaxy. You are all just like that, and there is nothing wrong with you at all._

 

It was oddly comforting. Comparing herself to cosmic wonders such stars should seem intimidating, but Josie could find solace in the fact that her problems were nothing when compared to all the atoms in the universe.

Josie never imagined she would find her insane soulmate endearing, but maybe hearing philosophical quotes while she was breaking down over exams was soothing.

 

The small passage picked at the core of her insecurities and snapped them away, a reminder that she did have someone for herself.

 

—

 

She was walking down the main hallway when she felt something.

Another thought, something her soulmate was panicking about.

 

_Note to self; don’t microwave a Capri Sun._

 

Without even stopping to completely process the thought, Josie takes off through the hallways in the direction of the kitchen.

A microwave? Really? For What? It’s made out of aluminum for god sake! Why her soulmate couldn’t just drink the damn Capri without blowing something up, Josie will never know.

 

She turns the corner, apologizing as she bumps into a group of werewolf boys, and tries not to get embarrassed from the intent stares of the witch coven.

 

And it was just as she suspected, the Salvatore School microwave was flashing error codes and smoking.

 

Nobody else was in the kitchen, she had to have just missed them.

 

There was no clear indication of what the small puddle of orange coloured juice was, but Josie was willing to bet it was Tropicana punch.

 

Her soulmate goes to Salvatore.

 

—

 

She’d had her suspicions for a while, the comments about boarding school, the references to a potions class, and their obvious supernatural status.

 

The thoughts had become more frequent recently, not any more cohesive, but seemed to be leaving an attempted paper trail for Josie.

With exams over, and Lizzie too enraptured with Hope to drag her to end of the year parties, she could follow the breadcrumbs.

 

She hadn’t expected the breadcrumbs to lead exactly to the place she’d been trying to avoid.

 

_What’s the thing MG says? Beer before liquor and you’ll go quicker? No. That can’t be it._

_Liquor before beer and you’re queer? Fuck, whatever._

 

Josie really wished she was with her soulmate for the sole purpose of scolding her weak sense of rhyme as it was obviously beer, not queer, and beer before liquor and you’ll get sicker. She’d taught the same rhyme to Lizzie the day of her first high school party.

 

Rhyming was the least of her worries, minor in comparison to the bombshell of a name her soulmate just dropped.

MG isn’t a popular name, even less likely to be used twice at a school with a population of about 500.

It had to be Milton Greasley.

 

Her soulmate was at the Old Mill digging themselves a hangover grave with her best friend. Only 30 minutes after almost destroying the school’s kitchen.

 

Her soulmate was insane, and maybe Josie loved it a little.

But enough to haul herself from the comfort of her room to the Old Mill party.

 

—

 

The Mill was packed full, filled with students desperate to shake off the anxieties of exam season.

 

She spots Lizzie and Hope first, near the campfire smiling at each other like some sick lovebirds.

Lizzie was wearing some simple party clothes, her sense of style was something Josie always admired, but her outfit was void of classic high heels. It might have something to do with the shorter redhead attempting to blow out a burnt marshmallow, and Josie files it away as something to tease her twin about later.

 

MG wasn’t far from them, sitting in a beanbag chair talking to a blonde witch about vampire behaviour double standards.

Josie awkwardly waves, trying to subtly get his attention. As soon as he seems remotely distracted the blonde witch takes off.

 

“Josie? What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t gonna show,” MG sits up from the chair, picking up a drink off the floor and downing it. “I thought the opportunity to avoid taking care of an emotional and drunk Lizzie was too great to pass up.”

 

She doesn’t really have a justifiable excuse for why she’s here, or at least a more simplistic one than _hey my soulmates kinda here getting drunk and you know them so I’m following the yellow brick road and it led me here._

 

“I changed my mind, I killed my long term memory cramming for those exams. I could use a break.” Josie replied, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

 

“You definitely need to relax a bit, you look panicky. Have you ever even been to a party without Lizzie?” Josie shook her head no and tried to seem more physically relaxed, which probably came off as awkward.

 

“Well, lucky for you, I have just the thing for a little bit of fun.” MG breaks through the crowd and Josie tries not to get lost while walking behind him.

 

“Lizzie would kill me if she found out, but she’s not here right now and you can make your own choices, Jo.” MG stops in front of the Old Mill entrance.

 

MG has always been an amazing friend, respectful and genuine but one of Josie’s favourite traits was his openness to letting Josie make her own choices.

He never felt the need to convince her into things or drag her around with him, MG was just there if you were down.

 

From the corner of her eye, Josie caught sight of everyone inside the Mill. There was weed, lots of it. People emptying blood bags into cups and mixing in shots.

 

Lizzie had always been stern about keeping her off this side of the tracks, but Lizzie wasn’t here.

 

“Okay, let’s go.”

 

MG rose an eyebrow. “You sure? Cuz if you're not we can just roast marshmallows with that new fire spell thing you got going on.”

 

“I’m sure, let’s have fun.” Josie meant for it to sound confident but her voice wavered in pitch change, she’s clearly nervous.

 

“Good girl gone bad, I like it.” MG turns and walks into the Mill, gesturing for Josie to follow.

 

Seeing a Saltzman on the dark side of the party must’ve been quite a shock. Josie felt like all eyes were on her as she walked close behind MG, trying to blend in.

 

There was no blending in.

 

Compared to all the witches in tube tops or the leather decked vampires, Josie in her plaid skirt and white button up stuck out like a sore thumb. Having all eyes on her wasn’t something she’s ever had, she was used to being at second glance.

 

“Well damn what did I miss? Is the principal’s daughter trading in her goody two shoes for leather boots?”

 

Kaleb stood in the corner of the room, holding a blood bag in one hand and a beer in the other.

 

Josie could feel her cheeks heat up with embarrassment at the joke. She was out of her element, and it’s not like the blasting music or making out couples did anything to settle her nerves.

 

“Don’t be like that man, she’s just here to hang. Have some fun y’know?” MG leaned up against the side wall, Josie following suite like a lost puppy.

 

“Damn. Being sisters with Lizzie Saltzman really turned you to drugs,” MG glared at him, and Kaleb’s smirk dropped a fraction. “But we can do fun. If you’re up for it.”

 

Josie could be bad. Maybe not burn down your crush’s room bad- never again, but maybe tipsy enough to wake up with a hangover in the morning. Maybe enough to do something reckless and possibly get away with it, if Lizzie remained as distracted with Hope.

 

“I’m up. For it I mean- like I can do it.” Josie hopes that didn’t come across jittery, and If it did Kaleb doesn’t show any signs of noticing.

 

“Okay, then stick around Saltzman.” Kaleb grabs a joint off the table to his left and holds it out to her. "You wanna hit the good kush, go crazy.”

 

Josie takes the joint from him holding it in her hand like a foreign object, but before she can ask about the general information of what the hell she’s supposed to do with drugs wrapped in paper, he’s gone.

 

“Maybe not that crazy,” MG plucks the joint from between her fingertips. “Peez just laced it with sex herbs, but I got a vodka soda in the back.”

 

_Sex herbs. Laced on the joint._

 

Josie tried to maintain a neutral expression as the gears turned inside her head, and finally clicked into place.

 

Her soulmate was a stoner, full on Snoop Dog at 3 am in the morning.

 

The lines of thinking she heard weren’t just average everyday thoughts, they were _stoner thoughts._

 

It wasn’t a normal thing to be up at ungodly hours questioning personal ethics in relation to types of flowers, it was a thing for teenagers smoking weed in a strict boarding school.

Josie would take pothead over serial killer any day, despite the voice in the back of her mind listing all the long term effects of underage marijuana consumption.

 

The list of smokers at Salvatore wasn’t too long, a couple of senior vampires, some preppy witches, and a few werewolves who used it to calm their quell their anger spurges.

 

Could her soulmate be one of the werewolf users? One of the gossipy witches Lizzie refused to interact with? What if they were already with someone?

 

Josie’s confident she’s on the verge of going nuts, when a new voice in the crowd snaps her back to reality.

 

“Fuck, what smells like updog in here?”

 

Updog.

 

Her eyes search through the crowd before she finds a face to match the voice.

 

And there was Penelope Park, standing at the doorway, looking completely drunk out of her mind, holding a half melted Capri Sun.

 

_Updog._

 

“It’s you.”

 

Penelope giggled at that. “Nah, can’t be me MG has updog written all over him.”

 

Penelope completely misses the point, but Josie’s too shocked to clarify what she meant.

 

Josie looks at her, _really_ looks at her, and thinks this time she’s actually seeing Penelope Park. “It’s was right in front of me this whole time but I could never see it.”

 

Penelope’s goofy expression seems to sober at that and her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “I mean yeah, I guess?”

 

“You’re my soulmate.”

 

If she seemed confused before, Penelope looked completely dumbfounded now.

 

Penelope let out a light laugh and stared at the rest of the witches, looking for mutual bewilderment but only finding stone-faced expressions staring at her expectantly. Everyone else had put the pieces together, even MG was doing back and forth double takes between them.

 

“God, what the fuck was in that drink?” Penelope pinches the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes, a weak attempt to sober herself up. “I’m sorry but this has to be some kind of mistake I’m not- we’re not soulmates.”

 

Josie laughs, not sure if it was because of the alcohol or the complete hilarity of the situation. “Holy shit, I thought you were a serial killer. How could you purposely eat pickles and peanut butter?”

 

The same girl who would enchant paper airplanes to hit her during class, and spell pineapple chunks onto her pizza when she wasn’t looking, was the _one._

 

“Yeah, no. There’s no fuckin’ way.” Penelope took a long sip of her Capri sun before dropping it to the ground. “My soulmate is some ukulele-playing Pisces chick who has an unhealthy relationship with fire.”

 

Josie can’t even deny how her heart picks up even just a fraction at the implications that Penelope heard her, that she was listening to Josie’s thoughts. The shorter girl had been hearing Josie tune her ukulele and set objects on fire she just didn’t know it.

 

Penelope was guarded about the subject, Josie could tell by the way she put her hands on her hips and tried to act disaffected.

 

“You would be a lot more convincing if you weren’t just describing me,” Josie took steps closer until they were merely inches apart.

 

Penelope stifled at that, her mouth opened and closed without any words coming out, her hands fidgeting with the hem of her leather jacket.

 

Penelope Park was speechless

 

Josie could take pride in knowing she was the reason.

 

“Alan Watts, really? You couldn’t just settle for Plato?” Josie gave her a lopsided grin and locked onto her eyes. “Looking out into the universe at night, we make no comparisons between right and wrong stars-”

 

“-nor between well and badly arranged constellations.” Penelope finished in a whisper, staring back at her with what Josie can only describe as pure endearment.

 

The stare was mutual.

 

“Wait. Hold up,” MG had finally collected himself from the initial shock after everyone else had already been distracted with a new bottle of tequila. “The avocado girl is JOSIE?”

 

“Avocado girl?” Josie’s face scrunched up in confusion, prompting Penelope to laugh.

 

Less than 10 minutes ago, pigs flying would be more plausible than Penelope nervously covering her smile as she stared at Josie, because Penelope Park was never shy.

 

But when Josie leaned down and their foreheads touched, she probably looked just as equally shy and nervous, if not worse.

 

Josie stares into her eyes, the same ones she’d seen staring at her from across the classroom and from the bench during football practice since grade 8. “Hi.”

 

Penelope stares back with equal intensity. “Hey”

 

“For the past 3 months I’ve been actually losing my marbles trying to figure it out,” Josie laughs nervously and shakes her head, “What the _fuck_ is Updog?”

 

Penelope grins. “Nothing much. How about you?”

**Author's Note:**

> hi. I really made a bet that I would finish a fic for once and actually PUBLISH it this time so here it is.
> 
> i had a weird experienced with some high friends recently and i was just like hey :) what about that random shit but with POSIE :) and stoner Penelope :) +Updog
> 
> there was an attempt to have it flow in some cohesiveness but I can't really judge how that came out with fresh eyes.  
> I swear i literally grammar checked it about 16 time google docs just pops up with nEw oNes!! 
> 
> You can check me @pocketsofposie on twitter if you find grammar errors or just to question my sanity ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


End file.
